Archive for Parenting Tips
Please and Thank You Training
Posted by: | CommentsYea, this is posted via timestamp, just to spare you from posts made 2 minutes apart.
Anyhow, here’s something that has come to mind recently about raising kids.
Our kids seem to do a better job with their “Please” and “Thank you” when we are not around. At least, they do a better job, it seems, of using them spontaneously. I wonder, have we trained them to, while in our presence, wait for us to say, “Now what do you say?” Or “How do you ask?” (And if you aren’t a parent and think that you’ll never use these words, you’re kidding yourself. They’ll come out eventually. And by the time you realize you sound like your parent, the habits will be formed. It will be too late.)
If they are being polite spontaneously while we are not around, I wonder how we can train them better to respond properly in our presence? For it seems rather difficult not to continually remind them in order for them to form the right habits. Anyhow, no answers here. Just thinking…
If you have the trick, I am all ears.
Learning through Math Test
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This season, Erin has home-schooled Abigail more or less through a Kindergarten curriculum. She just turned five, but she loves to learn, so we have sought to give her an opportunity to do so. As I trust is the case in any home-school situation (or any school situation, I suppose), however, we sometimes run into problems.
Two days ago was a case in point. I was in the living room when I heard Abigail clearly struggling with some anger. I walked to the office to inquire into what was going on. Erin informed me that Abby was ‘losing it’ because she missed one problem on her facts sheet. 24 for 25 overall. She was so angry with herself that she would not listen to our words of encouragement, but chose to rip the paper out of Erin’s hand in order to correct the problem and the score (for which she received some discipline later, of course).
As she was doing all this, however, Erin looked at me and said, “This is me.” To which I replied, “O man, we are in some trouble, because I was thinking that this was me!” No wonder she was struggling so much when both Erin and I wrestled with the same foolish perfectionist tendencies! I’m just hoping she has received our good inclinations as well as our sinful ones.
In reflecting upon this incident, however, I realized that in order to help Abigail on this front (and myself in the same situation), I have to help her see that the 24 out of 25 issue is really an issue of pride. Think about it: why is Abigail so frustrated with herself? Is it not because she has such a high idea of herself that she cannot stand to think that she might mess up a bit on her facts sheet? Sure, there are some other issues there, but knowing what I know about my own heart and the human heart in general, this is underneath it all. Rather than having a reasonable estimation of our status as imperfect human beings, we are often inclined to think so highly of ourselves that when we mess up a bit, we get down in the dumps to an extreme degree.
But this would not be the case were we inclined to humility. Sure, we would try the best we can, but in the end, we wouldn’t beat ourselves up over failing to reach perfection. We would strive, but at the same time be realistic in our striving. We would be free from a fear of failure. And what a sweet freedom that is! Certainly it is something I want for myself and for my little girl.
That being said, you can see why it is necessary for me to look into the heart of my child. For if I am not willing to face the fact that a little Math test may reveal great pride, I cannot help her work through the issue in a helpful and productive fashion. As a parent, it is my job to help her face such an issue of the heart and to give her hope that through Jesus, the sweet freedom of humility can be found.
God can certainly do wonderful things through a little Math test!
A Parenting Tip
Posted by: | CommentsFor all Dads and Moms to little boys, it seems wise to memorize the old school Spiderman song– if for nothing else, so that you can sing along while he wears it out in public (as Elijah did the other day). If you look at the picture below, be sure to recognize the two ‘bad guys’ off to the left. Spiderman gave them a good beat-down. He also generated his share of smiles.
Watch out for Spiderman!
